This morning I found my car door ajar, my stuff ransacked, and my GPS gone. My car was in my driveway, not 10ft from where I was sleeping.
At first, I was largely frustrated at losing the GPS and my apparent failure to lock my car (since there was no sign of forced entry). But I realized that besides the foolish loss of property, I was shaken. I felt violated, unsafe, and vulnerable.
Just last night, I spoke with a friend about how some neighborhoods in the area are less safe and that I considered mine to be more safe. But this too was taken from me. I found myself jumping at street noises and feeling suspicious of people in the neighborhood, after just last night feeling safe and content walking to and from Safeway in the fading light.
Yet the more I think about it, the more I'm finding myself grateful for the experience.
I can now see a little bit of how much I find security in the world around me, and how that isn't nearly as safe or reliable as I thought. And in placing so much weight on the stuff I can see (and feel like I can control), I'm not really relying on God for safety.
Yet He's the only one with any true control over my life.
Each and every breath I breathe is a gift of God.
He guards my life. And I can't compete with that. I have nothing to offer that can be bigger or stronger than the Creator of the Universe.
All I can choose is how to respond. I can cling to my fears and the things in this world that make me feel safer*. Or I can live into the truth that the LORD is my shepherd, and I shall not want.
The latter promises a freer life. Simpler, yes. But happier.
And I've just seen how the first can crumble overnight.
I praise God for this experience that showed me places I'm holding back, areas I haven't entrusted to Him, and I thank God for keeping me safe from harm.
(In this case, my possessions too – even the GPS unit was later found in the car!)
*As a disclaimer, I still fully support being smart about your safety – we have brains for a reason – and I for one plan to be extra conscientious of locking my car after I get out! :-)
